10-Things-Tuesday #2

I promised you an amazing post so I hope you’re ready. Tomorrow is the first of April and you all know what that means. April Fool’s Day. To help you out, I found 10 simple, but amazing, April Fool’s Day jokes. Most of these jokes I got from the internet, because I suck at jokes. Every year my mum pulls the same joke on me and every year I fall for it. Even though I now know tomorrow is April Fool’s Day I will probably still fall for it.
But let’s start with these 10 simple, but amazing, April Fool’s Day jokes.

  1. Fill as many plastic cups as you can find with water and place them strategically on the floor.
    Plastic cups
  2. Use an air horn as door / wall protector.
    Airhorn
  3. Set people’s alarm clock so it’ll keep going off during the day.
    Alarm Clock
  4. Cover a bar of soap with nail polish and let it dry.
    Nail polish
  5. Wrap someone’s phone in rubber bands.
    Phone
  6. Confetti bombs.
    confetti
  7. Print different pictures of the celebrity your victim hates and stick them all over their room.
    Celebrity
  8. Put flour in your victim’s hair dryer.
    Flout
  9. Put a zip-tie on any type of spray can and throw it.
    Spray can
  10. Fill a bowl with both M&M’s and Skittles.
    Skittles

Now, all you have to do, is sit and wait!!!

Have a nice Tuesday.

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FictionFriday #1

I thought we would change things up for this Friday as well. Instead of Face-off-Fridays I thought we could go with FashionFridays. Everyone is into fashion and people love to talk about it. I’m just kidding. I really don’t care about fashion.
We are changing things up, though. I came up with this fun idea. It could turn out to be a total disaster, but it will be a fun disaster. The idea is simple: Write a short story using one random chosen sentence from four different books. The four sentences will be the guideline for this short story, I will fill in the rest. So here we go, FictionFriday.

Sentence one from A Game of Thrones: He knew where they were bound.
Sentence two from The Fault in our Stars: You’ve never been on a plane before?
I’m already seeing a storyline here.
Sentence three from Wuthering Heights: The chairs were also damaged, many of them severely; and deep indentations deformed panels of the walls.
Sentence four from Alice in Wonderland: No, there were no tears.

Do I have a story for you!
He knew where they were bound. He had made the journey once before. He had left his hometown the moment he had saved up enough money to get out. It would take the plane exactly four hours to get from New York to his hometown. He had dreaded the journey for so long. He had promised his mother that he would be home this Christmas. She just knew it would be their last chance to celebrate Christmas together. She wouldn’t shut up about it, so he had decided to go. Never would he have guessed that, in the end, his mother would be right.
“You’ve never been on a plane before?” the woman next to him asks.
He looks at her and smiles. He isn’t in the mood for chit chat. “Actually, I have,” he answers curtly.
“It’s just, you look worried.”
“I’m not.”
“You should know that plane crashes rarely happen,” the woman says with compassion.
He wants to react, but the moment he wants to open his mouth, they’re falling. He feels a strange sensation. It feels like he’s flying. Now people are screaming. The plane is really going down.
Time seems to slow down. He can see everything clearly. His father and mother, the fight they had before he left for New York. It all seems so pointless right now. He wanted to hate his parents so badly.
The moment they hit the ground, he knows his mother was right. This was their last chance to spend Christmas together. There is a loud explosion, but the only person he can think about is his mother. More people are screaming. There is a fire that is heating his face. He can’t breathe. The plane has no more wings. The chairs were also damaged, many of them severely; and deep indentations deformed panels of the walls.
He is dying. No, there were no tears. It was too late for tears. 

My God, this was a serious story. I had no idea this would be the result, but just go with it.

Have a nice Friday.

ThankfulThursday #5

I won’t be writing a long post this Thursday, because I have this exam today and I have realized it’s really hard to be thankful for something when you have an exam. At first I thought I would write a post thanking the sun, but he doesn’t have an exam today. Then I thought I would thank the birds outside, but they don’t have an exam today either. In the end I wanted to write a post thanking my exam, but even he doesn’t have an exam today. (Woow, this just took a turn.) So then I thought, there’s always someone who has it worse. Today, I want to thank Pluto (not the dog, the planet) for always having it worse and making me feel better because of it.

Pluto has been through some sh*t in the past decade. He started out as a real planet. He was really something special. And then in 2006, out of nowhere, was told he wasn’t big enough to be a real planet anymore. From then on he would be a dwarf planet. But he didn’t let that bring him down.
Pluto has proven to the earth, to Mars, to Jupiter, to Uranus, to Neptune and whatever other planets are out there, that size doesn’t matter. For that I believe Pluto deserves a round of applause. You go, Pluto!
And it doesn’t matter what Neptune and Uranus are saying behind your back, you’re still a real planet to me. (I always root for the underdog.) Just let them talk. They’re just overcompensating for something else.
Nobody-cares-about-Pluto

In the end you’re all orbiting around the same sun!

Have a nice Thursday.

WhateverWednesday #5

I was looking through these mind blowing facts, I like to know random things nobody cares about, and came across some fascinating facts I just had to share with you. Some will make you laugh, while others might make you cry.

Fact: It is estimated that millions of trees grow thanks to squirrels forgetting where they buried their nuts.
That’s beautiful, but also really sad. They have been gathering these nuts for weeks and now they’re unable to find them. They’re just running around, with empty stomachs, confused and crying because they lost their nuts. Maybe they should start using treasure maps. I mean, squirrels would look super cute in a pirate costume.
Pirate_squirrel_1
They have been working their butts off to collect all these nuts. But at the same time, we do need the extra trees. This just shows that hard work never pays off, unless you remember where you left your nuts.

Fact: Otters hold hands while sleeping so they don’t float away.
original
Isn’t that the most romantic thing you have ever heard? While humans are polluting the earth, fighting wars and judging others, these adorable otters are dreaming peacefully knowing their loved one is safe by their side.
Isn’t that what we should be focusing on? Loving the people around us, holding their hand so we don’t lose them, instead of spreading hate about people we don’t even know.

Fact: Anatidaephobia is the fear that somewhere in the world, there is a duck watching you.
This fact really freaked me out, because until now I never really worried about ducks watching me, but now I can’t stop. Every time I see a duck I just know they’re judging me. I try to stare them down, but in the end he / she always wins.
images

Fact: A portion of the water you drink has already been drunk by someone else, maybe several times over.
So if I drink the water that, let’s say, Matthew McConaughey has drunk before me, I technically made out with him? I can live with that.
matthew-mcconaughey

Fact: Crying is how your body speaks when your mouth can’t explain the pain you feel.
This isn’t a real fact, but it is really deep.
096f256a83a199a4ce51475c96474c78f979b8b9566768d05e9e44771a819c0b

And to end this post with a uplifting ending: Whenever you’re feeling down, remember, you’re the sperm that won!
You’re a winner!

But, whatever.

Have a nice Wednesday.

10-Things-Tuesday #1

I thought it was time to change things up a bit. (Honestly, I just couldn’t think of another how-to.) So this Tuesday I will tell you 10 things I learned in High School. Don’t worry I’m not explaining math equations or English grammar.

Number one: Homework is just a way to separate the brainiacs from the slackers.
1

Number two: Teachers actually know what they’re talking about. Also, they aren’t deliberately trying to get you to fail. They actually want you to pass your tests.
2

Number three: Having your period is always a good excuse to get out of pretty much anything. Super effective on male teachers (yep, that’s a Pokemon reference).
3

Number four: Google knows the answers to all your questions, you just need to know where to look. Also, Wikipedia is your best friend.
4

Number five: Papers are 50% bullshit and 50% Wikipedia summaries.
5

Number six: There’s no cure for procrastinating.
6

Number seven: There’s always someone who got a higher grade.
7

Number eight: There isn’t such a thing as a cool kid. Everyone is awkward in High School.
8

Number nine: Deadlines are overrated.
9

Number ten: Grades don’t say anything about your intelligence.
10

Have a nice Tuesday.

MoodyMonday #5

Mood: Refreshed, but covered in toothpaste.

Recently I have come to the conclusion that I suck at brushing my teeth. It’s not something that requires special skills, but I just always mess it up. The things that other people find hard and difficult to learn, like math or sports, always come easy to me. (I’m not trying to brag, just hear me out.) But the moment I have to do these simple things, like using a fork and knife or putting on clothes, I just keep messing up. Usually, I can fake it until I make it, but brushing my teeth remains a challenge.
There is just no way of pretending I actually can brush my teeth like a normal person. You know in movies, when somebody gets poisoned and they have this white stuff coming out of their mouths. I know this is disgusting, but that’s what I look like when I’m brushing my teeth. Toothpaste is literally dripping down my face and onto my clothes. There’s just no way of hiding that. I’m just a drooling idiot. My clothes usually end up looking like a Pollock painting. (If you don’t know who Pollock is, you should Google him!)
download
I brush my teeth twice a day. So twice a day I’m covered in toothpaste. I actually don’t get dressed until I’ve brushed my teeth, because I know I will ruin my clothes if I do. Now you might be wondering, what can go wrong with brushing your teeth! Let me tell you!
The first problem is I hate standing still for too long. I need to keep moving, which is why I usually turn on some music while I brush my teeth so I can dance around the room. That’s probably not a smart thing to do, but I get bored if I don’t. And even when I don’t move around the room and just stand in front of the mirror things get messy.
Here I am, just brushing my teeth. No problem, just moving my electric toothbrush from tooth to tooth, but the moment I get to my front teeth and my lip moves slightly the waterfall of drool and toothpaste starts. Also, when I get to the teeth at the back of my mouth this little stream in the corner of my mouth appears. Now my toothbrush is covered in toothpaste as well and it’s dripping down my arm. This one drop is slowly getting closer to my sleeve, wanting to leave its mark. My toothbrush is getting slippery. I’m losing my grip. I lose control. My toothbrush seems to have a life of its own. (I could literally write an entire screenplay about me and my toothbrush, titled: Diaries of an electric toothbrush.) It’s just one big mess.

I personally blame gravity for all of this! Thanks, Newton!

Have a nice Monday.