Want-to-know-Wednesday #1

Being a human being can be confusing. Our lives get complicated and we always want to explain everything. Who am I? Where did we come from? Are there others out there in the universe? What is time? How does a plane fly? Where did I leave my glasses? Why do we sneeze? Why are puppies and kittens so cute? Who farted? (It wasn’t me, I swear!)
It’s in our nature to wonder about these things. We don’t like to be left in the dark. Not knowing scares us. Although life would be so much easier if we didn’t care. Monkeys don’t worry about whether their clothes match. Lions don’t care where their food came from. Fish don’t wonder what it would be like to leave the sea. And they all seem pretty happy!
But I’m here to help so today I’m answering one of the most pressing questions of our time. Even the smartest of academics and scientist haven’t been able to find the answer. Even Stephen Hawking was baffled by this question. Don’t worry. I’ve got it all figured out. Why didn’t he/she answer my text message? Let me tell you!!!
First you should know that there are three different scenarios. They didn’t read your message, they read your message and didn’t reply, they read your message and have been typing something for hours. Let’s start with scenario one. (I only wrote down the most likely reasons!)

Why didn’t they read my message?
– They lost their phone. It’s possible that they lost their phone and don’t even know you texted them.
– Their phone is turned off. People do turn off their phone (so I’ve heard).
– They can’t find their charger.
– They hate you! You suck and they just don’t want to talk to you.
– A unicorn stole their phone and took it back to Atlantis.

They read my message. Why won’t they reply?
blue-ticks-whatsapp-explained
– They don’t know what to say so they’re taking some time to think of a clever answer.
– After they read your message their mom took their phone, because no phones allowed during family dinner.
– They hate you! You suck and they just don’t want to talk to you.
– They read your message and a meteor hit the earth.
– They read your message at the zoo and an angry gorilla stole their phone.
– A unicorn stole their phone and took it back to Atlantis.

They read my message and they’ve been typing for hours. Why won’t they reply?
iphone_typing_indicator_bubble_still.png.CROP.promo-mediumlarge
– This is code for: I read your message and wanted to reply, but fell asleep midsentence.
– They read your message and accidentally touched their keyboard.
– They hate you! You suck and they just don’t want to talk to you.
– A unicorn stole their phone and took it back to Atlantis.

Stop panicking when people don’t immediately reply to your texts. You should be happy they don’t reply, that means they actually have a life outside of their phone and social media. Next time someone doesn’t reply give them a thumbs up.
thumbs up

Have a nice Wednesday.

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